I think a lot of people assume we searched out a child with special needs.  There are a lot of amazing families who do just that.  Their hearts are aching to help those kids that others toss aside.  That wasn’t our story though.  I never imagined being a mother to a child with Down Syndrome.

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Our adoption journey began by chance. Unlike a lot of adoptive parents we were not pursuing adoption when we learned about a baby boy due to be born who would need a mommy and daddy. My husband and I were in our mid 30’s and had two teen daughters and successful careers to keep us busy. For several years we talked about adoption off and on because I was no longer able to have children and my internal clock was out of control telling me I needed another baby.

For one reason or another we never took action and adopting a child was never made a priority.

Everything changed, suddenly and unexpectedly, late one April night in 2015. While I was thumbing through posts on Facebook, a mindless distraction after a long day at work, I stumbled upon a post from an adoption agency administrator. The post mentioned a baby due in four months who would be born with Down syndrome and several heart defects that would require open heart surgery shortly after birth. In that moment I knew this was written for me. I knew this baby was our baby and we needed to step forward. I knew God was sending me a message and calling me to act.

I read the post to my husband and he suggested we reply to the post and get more information. Neither of us had any idea what was about to happen. I think we both imagined there would be some sort of disqualifying event but we took a leap of faith and were contacted within ten minutes. It never occurred to us that anyone would read the post and reject this child. At that time our experiences with Down syndrome were pretty limited. I grew up with a much older second cousin who happened to have Down Syndrome. My interactions with him were limited to big family functions like weddings and funerals. I never really understood Timmy or why he was different but everyone loved him and nothing about him was scary to me. My husband had never known anyone with DS which may explain why he was never doubtful of our ability to care for this child.

We were officially matched with Wyatt’s birth mother when she was 20 weeks pregnant. She lived in a town 30 minutes from us. I still remember the heart racing and nonstop sweating I experienced the first time we met. I was honored and privileged to be invited to attend all of her prenatal, cardiology, and specialist visits. I heard his heart beat for the first time three weeks after reading that post. I was enamored by him long before he was even born.

The news of our adoption was surprising and shocking for many of our friends and family since we hadn’t been actively pursuing an adoption situation. Our initial announcements did not mention Down syndrome, only a beautiful baby boy we would be adding to our family. We believed it was important for people to know we loved this baby and see our excitement  first and foremost. Down syndrome, in our opinion, was one part of who he would be. It has never defined him. All but one of my friends received the news of his DS diagnosis with open hearts and welcoming arms. For that one person Down syndrome was scary. She needed time and the opportunity to meet him and be amazed by all that he is and can achieve before she was able to acknowledge he was the perfect baby for us.

Wyatt was born at 7:17 pm in August 2nd. Two days later we met him for the first time in the NICU. He was everything we hoped for and more. I loved every cell of his tiny six pound body and couldn’t have been more proud to show him to the world.

 

Our adoption was finalized when he was 8 months old. We have been blessed to share an open adoption with his birth families. Wyatt has grown knowing the love of all of his parents and grandparents.

People often ask “why Down syndrome?” Or “weren’t you afraid because he has Down syndrome?” My answer has always been the same. Why not? Down syndrome is not scary. Down syndrome is beautiful. My message to the world is that there is hope in all things. People, including people with Down syndrome, all want to be loved, accepted and included. Having an open mind and embracing heart led me to motherhood and has resulted in so many blessings. The extra chromosome in Wyatt’s body has made it possible for me to experience extra love, extra happiness, extra patience and a plethora of knowledge I would never have had without him. Wyatt came to us through domestic infant option. A lot of people say he was lucky to have been adopted. The truth is he is not the lucky one, we are.

Bio: Nichole and her family live in rural north Texas. She left her career in behavior analysis to open a licensed in home child care business when Wyatt was born. Today she is a stay at home mother of 3 who enjoys gardening, yoga, crocheting and refinishing furniture. Nichole is a strong advocate for open adoption and Down syndrome. Follow along on Instagram @wyatts.world2015. She invites you to share her experiences on Facebook

 

Be sure not to miss the post written by Wyatt’s sister: An adopted baby brother with Down Syndrome